Hello Bald Man-
A couple of years ago I was supremely overweight, and decided I needed to make some big time lifestyle changes. I joined a gym and started cutting back on calories wherever I could. Today, I have lost over 50 pounds. I feel great but I have about 25 pounds to go until I meet my goal weight.
My issue is peer pressure. When I first started trying to lose weight, my friends and family were always understanding. Now that I have lost a bunch of weight and my weight appears much more normal to people, I am encountering more and more situations where people will make excuses on my behalf, and try to goad me into indulging when I try and deny a dessert.
How should I approach this? I feel like a jerk having to constantly explain to people my dietary restrictions.
— Dieting and Frustrated
Hello Dieting –
Your story rings so true to me. I have been through this before and trust me, it does not get better with time. As a midwestern man, high calorie food offerings are rampant and I fight this battle at every family event I attend.
The first thing you need to realize is that, while unintentional, your friends and family are trying to bring you back to their level. You have done great and made a lot of progress, and they likely have not changed for the better at all during that time. Some of them might be actively getting fatter, and by comparison you are making them look bad.
DO NOT GIVE IN! If you do, it will become easier and easier to rationalize making bad food choices and you will end up right back where you started or worse.
The best advice I can give is to not worry about coming off as a jerk. First, you don’t have any obligation to explain why you are not eating or drinking something. If you are offered a piece of cake, a simple ‘No thank you’ should be sufficient. You can also just lie and say you already are full, or had dessert earlier. If someone is pushy about it, be direct and let people know that you are actively working on losing more weight.
If you have someone in your life that is still pushy after that you need to sit them down in private and go one-on-one with them. Explain to them the food, like alcohol or drugs, is an addiction for you, and what they are doing is akin to telling an alcoholic that ‘One drink won’t hurt’. That might not be entirely true for your situation, but it will almost undoubtedly get them to back off with the dessert pushing. They may even gossip about that conversation to others, and word will spread which should make your life easier in the long run. If that person still persists, sorry, they are just an asshole.
Sincerely,
Bald Man
Bald Advice 